Ich Bin Ein Berliner!

(If you have no idea about the title of this blog I highly suggest you google it. It's a bit of a mix up that JFK made when he came to Berlin in the 60's. So type it in with JFK before or after to get the story. Knowledge has been dropped)

I left Stuttgart about 9:30am as I wanted to get to Berlin before rush hour. Back in the B-class and on my way. I punched the Berlin airport address into the navigation and was off to the autobahn. As I drove through Stuttgart I passed a rather eclectic car dealership, Cadillac, Hummer, Corvette (just vette’s) and…..Ferrari. How random? I hit the autobahn but of course it was raining out. Could my driving experience get any better? Though along the way there were long stretches of dry road with no speed limit. Unfortunately my little B-class likes to cut out at about 6,500rpm so going fast was not something that was going to be easy, though I think at one point I was cruising at about 105 or so. For the rest of the trip where no speed limit was posted I was doing just fine at about 90-95mph until the guy in the Porsche or Audi came up behind me. Other than that it was raining most of the way to Berlin.
About 1/3rd of the way to Berlin the gas light came on. I had passed a service station a while ago and didn’t know when the next one was coming up. I exited off the highway and found a sign pointing to gas. At this point the gauge was just about on empty. How good would this be running out of gas in the middle of Germany where I’m pretty sure NO ONE remotely speaks English? This hypothesis was proven true very soon. After getting off the highway and following the sign for gas I somehow ended up on a two lane road in between two small German towns. I followed the road into a random little town. There was certainly no gas station here. I found a couple walking around and asked “Sprechen sie Englisch?” “Nien” They replied with a small, almost unnoticeable chuckle. “Petrol!?!” I exclaimed throwing my hands up to about shoulder height with my palms facing the heavens. They pointed in the direction and I believe they said something along the lines of a half kilometer. It was certainly farther than a half Kilometer but I made it. This off highway service station was huge. It had a gas station, diner, supermarket, Burger King, kebab shop, the German equivalent of a Home Depot AND a SEAT dealership. I gassed up; 65 euro for a full tank! The attendant informed me it keeps going up. I then headed to the kebab shop as cheap nourishment was needed after spending that much on gas.

Back on the highway it rained and rained and then cleared up and then rained again. Once in the general Berlin area the navigation system started to lead me on a wild goose chase. First I got off the highway into a small town and drove down a 2 lane road that connected several towns to each other. After a good 20 kilometers of this and I was back on a highway. After some time on the highway I was told to get off, which I did, onto a smaller highway and then off another exit. I was then told to follow streets through a neighborhood and that the airport was not far, maybe 7 kilometers away. I knew something was wrong when while driving on a perfectly normal paved road the navigation told me I was off the road driving in dirt. Then the real kicker came. I was driving up a small street and came to a dead end! The highway was on the other side of the fence; I was to go straight according to my navigation system. I retraced my steps back to the highway and drove towards any sign pointing to Berlin Shonefeld Airport. Finally I reached it, dropped off the rental and headed for the metro to catch the train into town. While at the information booth I discovered that I had struck gold once again. My hotel was right around the corner from the train station! 3 for 3 in Germany! Just when I got off the train I wasn’t sure which way around the corner and ended up doing a loop or two. The hotel was on Monbijouplatz. Now, there’s a Monbijou strasse and a Monbijouplatz in the area around the train. The former was all I could find on the map until a very close look discovered the latter. I got situated and decided to take it easy as it had been a long, stressful, yet interesting day of travelling through the German countryside.
Once my hotel room became agonizingly uninteresting to stay in any longer I headed out to explore Hackescher Markt, my new home until Sunday. I wandered through the neighborhood looking at all of the different shops and restaurants. Everything from traditional German, to pizza, sushi to Mexican even! Most of the shops were clothing stores selling locally made street wear or designer labels. I ended up back around the train station at a small sushi spot with outdoor seating. The sushi wasn’t too bad. It had been a while now since my last encounter with seafood and considering Berlin is a global city I figured how bad could it be? Once dinner was finished it was about 9pm. I walked around some more, peering into different shops looking for some ice cream but not finding what I wanted. On the way out of one store I almost collided with a tall, very attractive, dark haired woman wearing pink go-go boots, black tights, a short jean skirt and a jean jacket. Her friend not far behind her was wearing pink go-go boots, black tights, a black skirt and a black top. I would find out later that night that these were the women of the night, working the corners around Hackescher Markt and beyond.

I gave up on ice cream and found a beer called Erdbeer Porter; a strawberry flavored porter beer which was refreshing even though it was a bit too sweet. After finishing this in my hotel room I decided to go grab a pint at the Irish pub down by the station. These were my first few hours in Berlin.

The next day I woke up and set out to find a café with free wifi. The receptionist at the hotel wasn’t a huge help so I ventured out to the one place she recommended; Starbucks. They had wifi but for 8 euro and hour, not gonna happen. Though as I was walking out the guy behind the counter was nice enough to inform me of a few places I could try. The first was closed; the second one was nowhere to be found. Finally on the other side of the train station I found La Siesta’s: a small, comfortable coffee shop with wifi. A cappuccino and a bagel would be my breakfast as I spent a good hour catching up on things.

Once done with breakfast I felt the need to explore. I first made my way to the old Jewish cemetery and strolled through there. It was more of a memorial to the old cemetery since it had been leveled during WWII. There were a few grave stones left as well as a sculpture right as you entered to commemorate those who perished. After the cemetery it was down the street to the “new” Jewish Synagogue. The Synagogue was quite ornate with a large brass dome in the middle lined with gold accents and two smaller domes with gold accents on either side. Somehow this survived not only WWII but the infamous “night of broken glass.” The one problem was that it was not open to the public today for some reason and members of the German police were patrolling outside. At this point it was time to retreat and collect some energy as I decided it would be a good night to do a pub crawl. I had received a flyer about one the night before. The crawl consisted of 4 bars and one club. The bars were always the same, the club changed nightly. 12 euro’s for one free beer during meet up, free shots at each bar and a discounted drink menu. This sounded way better than the Prague crawl already.

After nap time concluded I headed to the store around the corner for some pre gaming materials. I found two large beers with decent alcohol content (5.6 and 5.4 respectively) for less than 5 euro. I drank, showered and shaved and headed down a bit on the early side to see what the turnout would be on a Tuesday night. I waited, first 3 people showed up then 3 more. I said why the hell not and joined in. Within a minute of this there were about 30 people standing around drinking in the middle of Hackescher Markt (I do love Germany’s lenient open container laws) waiting to get the crawl rolling. The main guide, Mark gave us a quick rundown of what was going on, and even a description of the first bar we were going to. The first place had all sorts of old-school Soviet/ KGB decorations and flags. I bought a round of jagerbombs for a group I was with and the favor was returned. At this point I needed to get some smokes but the machine was broken. One of the chaperones for the crawl walked me over to the nearest store, whoa; they didn’t do that in Prague, I liked this already, once I returned free shots were being handed out; vodka with cranberry followed by straight jager shots, this better not end up being some kind of reenactment of my 21st or 22nd birthday.

The next bar, Mark informed us was a cocktail lounge and that they had a discounted menu for crawlers, they had this special shot for 1 euro called a party shot that contained Sambuca and something else dangerous. I was outside talking with a group from Michigan when I noticed a familiar brown bottle with a blue label and a portrait of a famous brewer/ patriot on it in each of their hands. THIS BAR HAD SAM ADAMS!!!! I was smiling from ear to ear as I was handed two by the bartender. We made our way to the next bar, but at this point I had three Sam’s in hand and couldn’t bring them into the next bar. So I sat outside drinking my Sam’s feeling giddy like a schoolgirl (it’s really the little things in life that make me happy). The group came out and we ventured to our 4th bar called Zapata’s. This place was huge! Part bar, part art collective, part nightclub, part graffiti covered not been touched since the cold war building. But it was possibly the coolest bar I’ve ever seen. There was a huge backyard area which was covered with sand and sculptures and graffiti everywhere, plus they had a live band playing. I ended up staying only in the backyard conversing with a mixed group of people from Copenhagen as I would be heading there next. Occasionally I would go into the first room which had a dance floor.

The chaperones rounded up everyone and brought us outside to announce we were heading to the club. I was starving and ran next door to get myself some kebab. Go figure by the time I came outside the group was nowhere to be found. No club for me tonight, I started back towards base camp. I found a group of people waiting for the tram and struck up a conversation with them for a bit, mainly starting with how I get back to Hackescher Markt. They were fairly pleasant to a drunken tourist. They easily made out my accent and started in with the whole “pahk ya cah” shtick, I played along for a bit. Their tram was coming so I bid them farewell and good times at the club. With the TV tower as my bearing I headed in that direction until I made my way back into Hackescher Markt and was hilariously bombarded by prostitutes. No thanks honey!

Once again I woke up the next morning NOT HUNGOVER! I love this German purity law. Honestly at this point I don’t think I’ll ever drink any other kind of beer with the exception of Sam Adams. So to all my friends, co-workers and acquaintances out there reading this, when I get back we can only go to places that serve authentic German beer. Ok maybe that’s wishful thinking but on with the events of the next day. After breakfast it was time for a bit of sightseeing. I jumped on the train at Hackescher Markt and went down 3 or 4 stops to the Berlin Hauptbahnhof and made my way to the Reichstag building. This was the main parliament building in Germany for many years and was seized by Hitler in the 1930’s after a fire broke here. I wanted to go inside and walk through the new dome at the top but the line was out the door and down the stairs. Probably about an hour and a half wait, I had other things to see. From there I headed down to the famous Brandenburg gate. I walked through it to Pariser Platz and roamed the area for a bit. I even saw the Adlon Hotel, the hotel where Michael Jackson dangled his baby from the 5th floor balcony. So fitting to mention this at a time when the whole world is mourning the death of the King of Pop.

After this it was down the street to the Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe. The monument was about 19,000sq meters and consisted of 2711 slabs of concrete all different heights due to the gently rolling ground. This was a controversial monument (I would come to find out a few days later while on a bike tour) not only because of its design but because of a little known fact. All over Berlin there are massive amounts of graffiti. 2711 concrete slabs are a perfect target for taggers. So the builders covered it with a special coating so if spray paint was applied it could easily be removed. The interesting twist is that the company who made the coating which had been around for generations happened to have a sister company who made Zyklon B during the war. The company issued statements and apologies to the German people as well as a refund on the coating.

After walking through the memorial and honestly feeling a bit confused as to the symbolism of the memorial I decided to ponder its meaning over a nice cold beer and some food. I found a spot and ordered their XXL currywurst and a Radler which is lemon flavored beer; very refreshing on a hot day like today. They weren’t kidding about their XXL currywurst, this thing was about 15 inches long. I knew after this it would have to be a long, long time until I could eat currywurst again. After lunch I headed downstairs to the memorial exhibit. It was comprised of five large rooms. The first room was a timeline starting with Hitler coming to power all the way up to when the concentration camps were liberated. From there the next room was a dark room with 16 large installations on the floor of letters and documents from Jews that perished during the atrocities. A few were letters to loved ones saying goodbye forever and that they have no idea what will become of them. I’ll admit this section of the memorial got me chocked up a bit.

The next room focused on several large families from all over Europe. These families were from everywhere from Poland to Hungary to even France. It described the family, what they did, and the members of it. It also mentioned who died and how they were split up. The next room was a large theatre with a women’s voice reading a written account of a holocaust survivor. The final room showed all the European countries involved and where all of the concentration camps were located as well as pictures of the largest ones from each country. I left feeling moved, saddened and enraged all at the same time. I’ll refrain from pontificating on this as it will just put me in a bad mood and why be in a bad mood in Europe. Once back upstairs on street level I walked through the memorial again and figured it out. When Jews were taken to camps the entire family was spilt up; men go one way, women another, children another, grandparents another. So imagine making it out alive (or not) and trying to find your family. It’s like wandering through a maze looking for someone. They may be right behind you but since there are massive stone columns in front of you, you can’t see them and they can’t see you (I would later find out this is not what the columns or the memorial are supposed to symbolize but I like my interpretation better).

I returned to the hotel for some rest and relaxation. As night fell over the German sky I made my way down to the Markt for a few beers and some people watching. With the TV tower in the shadows hidden amongst tree’s Hackescher Markt was alive and well. I sat there drinking my Heffeweizens watching the faces stroll by. Street performers, the sound of hundreds of conversations jumbled together and the muted rumble of trains running through the station above set the soundtrack for the night with the occasional conversation around me chiming in like a solo. Usually always in German: a language I have very little grasp of other than gutten tag, dunkeh, sprechen sie englisch, and ein bier bitte. I was content just sitting watching all the people walk by and just thinking about everything and nothing. Sometimes the most relaxing places are the loud, crowded squares and if you’re lucky enough you can just sit and drink it all in.

The next day was rather nasty out, cold and rainy. After the usual morning run I decided to wander up to Pariser Platz on foot. I made my way past the museum island and continued towards my target. I made it about half way when I noticed a building with a Bentley and Volkswagen showroom inside. Normally I would have just walked right by. I fix, drive and see more impressive automobiles then this on a daily basis back home at work….Until I saw the Bugatti Veyron in the window, next to a vintage Bentley 12 cylinder race car from the 1930’s. Ok now I had to go in for sure. I drooled a bit, took my photos and went on my way. After some more walking in the rain and such I decided to head back to the hotel and chill out, the weather was less than ideal and I wasn’t feeling much like dealing with it. Some real downtime would do me good, get some reading done and write some more as well.

Later on I showered and such and decided to do go walk up Oranienburger strasse. As I made my way past the Oranienburger S-bahn station I ran into Kel and D, 2 guys from the pub crawl the other night. We hung out on the corner for a bit updating each other on what has been going down since the other night. We wandered for a bit grabbing a quick doner kebab and some Berliner Pilsner beer. At this point the prostitutes were out and we tried to snap shots of them but their John’s were all over the place. I later asked one if I paid her would she be willing to let me record her on camera sending a hello to a good friend of mine back home whose had his panties all in a bunch since all I’ve done is text him a few random times. Nothing too dirty, clothes didn’t even need to come off, just a quick; Hello, (insert friends name here) I can’t wait for you to come to Berlin so I can (insert overly gratuitous, sexual gestures). Apparently it was too much to ask as they she said no filming. I said “come one this is the quickest (however much we could agree on) you’re gonna make ever.” She wasn’t into it.

Back hanging with Kel and D they told me they went back to Zapata’s the night before and we decided to head back once again. We went straight for the back yard area and straight for 3 Beck’s beers. This would be the first of many, many rounds. Many rounds and some kebab later and it somehow became 4am. We all walked back towards Hackescher Markt. It was the best way for them to get to their hotel via the train. We parted ways for the night as they had to head out in the afternoon.

The next morning I woke up rather late and once again not hung over. I recalled Kel telling me about a bike tour they took the other day and highly recommended it to me. I decided it needed to be done. I missed the first trip which left at around 11am so I would catch the 4pm ride. Honestly, I think the last time I rode a bike was on a trip to Martha’s Vineyard when I was in summer camp years ago. We’re talking like 10 year or so. This was going to be interesting. I headed over to where the tour met up underneath the TV tower. The group was comprised of about 15 people or so from all over the world. There was a father with his 2 kids from Romania. A couple from Australia, a couple from Florida etc…. Our tour guide, Ingo, lead the way; we left the TV tower area and headed around the corner to Alexander Platz to learn about the square, the new red town hall, and general history as well. From there it was on to the Carl Marx statue and onward to many other sites including the Brandenburg Gate, book burning memorial, Pariser Platz, Checkpoint Charlie, one of the last remaining sections of the wall, Potsdamer Platz, the site of Hitler’s bunker and others. From there we rode the whole way through the Tier Gardens passing by the Soviet war veteran’s memorial. At the end of the park was a beer garden where we stopped for dinner, more liters of beer and food. I’m going to have to hire a personal trainer when I get home…or starve myself for the rest of this trip.
After dinner concluded we got back on the bikes went back through the Tier Garden and stopped at the victory column, or as Ingo told us as some Americans call it the “chick on the stick.” From there we stopped at the Jewish memorial, I learned of the true meaning of the columns, they were meant to symbolize burial tombs and mass graves. I still like my interpretation better. We stopped for a bit at the Reichstag building, continuing on we passed a building that still had bullet damage from WWII; that was cool to see. Our final stop was on Museum Island to the Berliner Dome as well as the Pergamon Museum. Ingo told us that during the war all of the statues on the Berliner dome were taken down and sunken to the bottom of the spree river and other ponds and lakes during the war. The Pergamon Museum is where the majority of Nazi Propaganda and speeches were given.

We returned to the TV Tower to conclude the tour. I wished I had done this my first day. I was so interested in learning more now, especially considering they offered other tours that dealt with the cold war as well as Nazi Germany/ The Third Reich. Unfortunately with tomorrow being my last day I would not have a chance to delve deeper. I returned to Hackescher and grabbed a few beers before returning to the hotel, I was tired.

My final day in Berlin was nothing amazing to speak of during the day other than the usual wandering. I decided to do one last pub crawl as the first one was a lot of fun but I didn’t get to the last stop. During the day on the other side of the Tier Garden was a huge gay pride rally/ parade and there was a bus right outside my hotel at one point blasting music. As I walked down to the crawl, looking good, some guy in a pseudo-Elvis costume followed closely behind me until I turned around and caught him. All his friends were cracking up, as was I. I was the first person to show up but soon a group of three ladies from Australia showed up, we chatted for a while until more people showed up. I spent the first 45 minutes mingling with others. I met an older gentleman (in his 50’s) who brought his 19 year old god-daughter on the crawl. At first it was a bit weird but after talking with them for a while he was actually an interesting person. His god-daughter was travelling around and he figured he’d take her out and show her a good time all the while taking care of her since he now lived in Berlin. He even somehow guessed I was from Newton! He knew I was from Boston he said “I know you’re not from Southie, You must be from Newton.” Apparantly he worked with many people from Boston for 15 years.

We left for the first pub and I ended up hanging out with a group of 5 guys from Dublin. Irish people are great! Lots of laughs were heard from our nook of the bar. I told them of my experiences in Ireland (both good and not so good), they were glad to hear I had a great time. They were cracking up hysterically when I told them the Jersey Girl incident, as well as my issues at Copper’s. They told me about some other place I should have gone. The name I can’t recall but apparently there’s a better club then Copper Face Jack’s (CATHY!!!!!!).

We headed to bar number 2, the cocktail lounge, and I immediately ordered three Sams; two for me and one for my Irish buddy Leslie who was asking me earlier at the first bar why all American beer sucks. I told him to have a Sam. He enjoyed and acknowledged that it was indeed good. I found my Aussie friends again and conversed with them for a while until it was off to bar 3. Once inside bar 3 I mingled in with a bunch of girls from Colorado. We had some laughs, some drinks and plenty of dance floor action. We left there en route to Zapata’s and the Colorado girls and I were going back and forth the whole way. I was having a good time and Zapata’s did not fail to deliver. The Colorado girls ran off and I caught up with my Irish buddies for a while until we headed to the club. Once at the club I needed some cash, I found an ATM around the corner but was having trouble finding my way back (oh inebriation, how you mess up my sense of direction). I didn’t want a repeat of the first crawl. Finally I found the club but as I was walking back in the club, the Colorado girls were taking off. As usual. I ordered a drink and found my Irish friends again. This club was not only packed but hotter than any place I had been to. I needed some fresh air. Leslie and I headed outside for a smoke and they all decided to head off. I headed back to the hotel, I had a long journey to Scandinavia in a few hours.

To Conclude, Berlin may be my favorite city in Europe (that I’ve seen). It’s not just the history but to think that even 40 years ago this place was a wasteland torn by war and politics. You look at Berlin today and while there is still much to be cleaned up (at least in the east, didn’t venture too much into the west), it is a thriving, global city with much to see and do and a nightlife that doesn’t quit no matter what day of the week it is. I do wish I had ventured west more, but there is of course always next as I’m sure there will be one. Onward to Copenhagen!